Life has not always been a bed of roses neither has it always been a bush of thorns but a mixture of both.To get to the roses,I have mostly had to go through the the thorns and the roses have always given me inspiration to pass through the the thorns and though at times I get pricked,I have learned the science of first aid or a visit to the Doctor's,get the wound treated and bandaged and then back to the thorny bush yet again.
It takes a while to learn how to appreciate life's challenges.To embrace them as one's teachers as opposed to one's enemies!It is an art that must be mastered.Though not a must,it is safer for you to realize that challenges and difficulties and trials,don't come your way to show you how weak you are but to make you stronger.Ever wondered why that one challenge always comes your way?Well,its because there is a lesson for you to learn there and if you do not learn,it will keep coming your way till the day you do!Sounds boring right?Well,why not just sit down,take time with the situation,keep off pity parties and become a scientist in your own right and make a discovery about why?Try and figure out what keeps taking you to that same road,to that same pothole,to the same puncture,on the same tire?You would rather take time sweeping the dirt on your carpet and collecting it rather than pushing it underneath because it shall collect and the day you will have to.it won't be a pretty sight or a fun experience either!
it took the Israelites 40good years round the same mountain for them to finally learn the lesson.Now,the Israelites back in the day used to live long,nowadays you do not have the luxury of taking too long in one spot.And life is not school.You know at school,there;s only enough number of times that you can be allowed to repeat a class before even the teachers quit on you.Life never quits on you.It will bring you the same exam over and over till the day you pass it or the day you leave it i.e. you leave life in other words,die.
Is there a recurring problem in your life?It is crying for attention.It wants you to stop ignoring it and take time to attend to it.And you will be grateful you took the time!If there is a problem that I took a while to solve it was one of the male species!These people gave me a ride of my life that just drove me insane.How I am normal to this date,It is the grace of God.(ok,it wasn't that bad)
So,I matured before my time.Got its up and down sides but I got over it and embraced it as the only life I will ever have ,so,when life gives you lemons,make lemonade,that's what I did.Any way,I had made a vow of no dating in high school!Like no relationships and woe unto you if my mind is made up on something,I just don't burge but that does not mean I did not flirt.Oh my gosh!If ever there was an award for the greatest flirt,I would have won it a couple of times.Now,maybe I was not as excited about boys as my fellow girl students were because to me they were not a new phenomena or discovery.I have always had them around.I have 5brothers,my primary school had boys in it,so really?Ok,at first,I just used to look at some girls and wonder,'All that just so as to get his attention?Even you are better than that' but I came to appreciate the fact that not all of us grow in the same environment hence for them this was just an awesome discovery,so I let them be.I just had my fun watching the live drama!
So,I did have proposals,I mean,I am a sight to behold,fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God.You think that's bragging?It's me being confident in the fact that God did an awesome job with me.Everything He created He saw it good and that includes me!So,let me not start on that now but you will definitely read it here sometime.I did get proposals,which I always did turn down,because of my solemn vow. There are some who were convinced I was their girl friends,I guess whatever makes you smile?Any way,I had my fun flirting and being accused of stealing peoples men and this right here is a whole lecture on itself so I shall not go into it!Ok just one mention,your man or woman does not get stolen from you,they just don't fight to stay with you.They just allow themselves to be swept by the wave.Oh and know that if I meet your man at a party and I have never met him before,unless he tells me,I have no way of knowing if he is hooked or not so don't bring your drama to me but go deal with your man!
Those were just by the ways.I was hated because of men i never really had but well,that's life,I guess.So,I had my fun flirting around and then finally high school was over and my contract with single hood was over,unless I was interested in renewing it?I didn't give it much thought and what?The dam had burst and the water just came gushing out!Now my drama with men began!
My first boyfriend,(names with held for security reasons)had first asked me out while I was in class 8 or form one but then,the contract above had already been signed so...I told him if he could wait till I finish high school,then,maybe.And shock on me!When I finished high school he was there!Now,anyone who was with me in high school knows what a cray time I had there and not good crazy...Anyway,by the time I left,I was a wounded girl.Very wounded inside.With no self esteem but you don't go airing out your dirty linen in public,now do you?So to the outside world,I had it all together but deep inside I was in pieces...Story for another day.So now,I did not believe in myself and...I can't give the prescription before the diagnosis!
So,he asked me out again and I figured,'why not?'So I said yes.It lasted six months before i call it quits!What happened?It just did not work.He loved raving,I have never raved(and don't plan to)I loved church,being a born again someone.We just had a lot of clashing.It reached a point,I couldn't take it any more...The events that led to our break up were very very interesting.
So,I had been thinking about breaking up for a while,only I did not know how to do it because I did not want to hurt him.So I was still buying time...On my birthday,he decides to tell me that his ex is pregnant with his child!Yeah,that's how insensitive people can be.Triple C was the way I went about it...Cool,calm an collected.Now,I believe I will end up in a psychology class at some point in my life because the way I have people figured out?It's not even funny.I think I just pay attention to the small things in life and those,I have come to learn,carry a lot of secrets...So,the way he was casual about it,the environment he told me in...something was a miss.I decided to play his game.I told him it's ok.That we would work it out once the bundle of joy came but that I was not going to leave him.I mean,that was his life before me,so....
I went and shared it with my friend and how my heart was troubled about how that story was fake?And the truth came to me.There was no pregnant ex.He had spotted someone else and wanted to get out the easy way.You know,he had planned on me acting out,slapping him and causing all kind of drama?Now I know I am a drama queen but I don't waste my drama,otherwise it will become boring.Oh,but when I heard there was someone else,now that was drama right there.Now you need to know I was not hurt that he had a side dish,my pride was wounded.How could he?Me of people?And that was worth drama only he went into hiding...To cut the long story short,I broke up with him,through the phone...Not my ideal way but he went into hiding,what was I to do?
This whole drama was an ice breaker!So 6months later,that was gone.Now,the rest of the relationships had a life span of at most,three months and after a couple of guys,I figured there was something wrong!And while I'm on the wrong things,let me just mention,saved and not saved,deadly combination.Don't sneer,it's true.I dated a whole string of anti saved guys in the name of I will influence them and convert them to believers...never happened!But I did pray with one but this was after we were broken up!Truth of the matter is one of you will have to give up their beliefs for the sake of the other and a smoothness in the relationship.In my case,I was not giving up the one thing that really defined me,my relationship with God and neither were they giving up their ways so conflicts always arose and this is because we are both operating under different rules.It's either one gives in or conflicts will be a part of your relationship.Now,I do not like things that mess with my piece of mind and a relationship that seems to be chocking the most important relationship in my life is something I do not need.So you wonder why I kept going out with guys who were not saved time and time again?Yeah,the day I started wondering that is the day I started asking questions and my scientific research started.Trying to figure out why it is I felt like I needed to have a man around...You thought I had forgotten about the roses and thorns?Nope.There always more than one way to get to your destination.I decided to take the long route.I figured it would be more interesting,we would get to see more things and if you have been keen,you have two or three things that you have picked that I hope will affect you positively...
So,the million pound question,Why do I feel the need to have a man around me?hmmmmm....Stick around for part two and you will found out!
xoxo
Moulding Beauty.
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